How Lauren Elise Rogers is Revolutionizing the Sexual Education Field with Heart and Hope
By: Margaret Spencer | Photos by: Ashlee Glen
Editor’s Note: This article has been updated to correct an error in Lauren Rogers’s professional title. In the original version, she was referred to as a counselor. While she provides guidance and support, she is not a licensed counselor. The correct designation is certified educator and coach. Lynchburg Business regrets the error.
Although phrases like “Your past doesn’t define you” and “You are more than what happened to you” bear some truth and offer some measures of solace and empowerment, they can also undermine the lived experiences of trauma survivors. For many of us, rebuilding our lives after traumatic events is a process that is indelibly tied to that event or those events; we can define who we are, but that definition is forever shaped by the trauma we endured. And then, in some remarkable cases, trauma survivors exercise agency by choosing to face their trauma head-on, grapple with it, and ultimately transform it into a tool that can help others navigate similar situations with more support. One such extraordinary case is that of Lauren Elise Rogers, who is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator, an Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach, and the founder of Sex Ed for You, the business through which she offers her education and coaching services.
With Sex Ed for You, Rogers has carved out a safe and informative space for those struggling with an extensive range of issues related to one of the most widely practiced but also most highly stigmatized aspects of human existence, and she has done so while contending with her own relational and sexual trauma.
“I grew up with really narrow definitions of what sex was, who it was for, who it belonged to, and who I belonged to,” Rogers said. “I got married when I was 21, and I found myself inside a world where it wasn’t appropriate to talk about the difficulties going on inside of this space that I had been told was the right place for sex. I found myself alone, sad, and feeling like I had no one I could talk to; my mother had passed away three weeks after I got married. It was a really dark and lonely space for a decade.”
Rogers was ultimately able to talk to someone who encouraged her to get into counseling, and that counselor’s response to her plight changed the way Rogers thought about sex and marked the beginning of her journey toward rewriting the narrative—both for herself and alongside her many future clients.
“Once the counselor heard what was going on in my life and marriage, her jaw hit the floor,” recalled Rogers. “She recommended that I put some boundaries up in my own life and that I stand in my ability to choose. This notion had never been presented to me before—that I have a right to and responsibility for my own self and my own agency.”
After getting divorced, Rogers wondered if there was “a way to be an ethical human who understands her own sexuality.” In search of answers, she went on a deep dive and began to heal. This inner healing was outwardly apparent, and people started asking Rogers what caused the dramatic change. Among those asking were clients at the Motherhood Collective, a nonprofit supporting new mothers that Rogers founded and once led.
“I told them, ‘I know enough to help myself, but I don’t know enough to help other people,’” Rogers noted. “I started researching education programs, found a Certified Holistic Sexuality Education program, and enrolled in January 2021. I thought at that time that I would integrate what I learned into my work in maternal health. But at about four months in, I wrote in my journal: ‘This is my new calling.’ I had no idea how incomplete and inaccurate my understanding of sexuality and sexual expression was and no idea how much was willfully withheld from me. I realized that the decisions I had been making were not informed, and they were also not my fault. I knew at that point that I had to retire from maternal health and start a new business in this field.”
Rogers founded Sex Ed for You in January 2022 and assumed that the bulk of her work would consist of leading courses and consulting for various groups rather than coaching individuals and couples.
“I doubted that people would sign up for individual and couple coaching, but the joke was on me!” she remarked. “No one really booked courses, but everyone wanted individualized care to dig deeply into the sexual values that had been handed down to them and the sexual scripts that they had been following blindly. The business took off, I went viral on Instagram in October 2022, and I now have clients all over the world [Rogers offers both in-person and virtual coaching]!”
Rogers’ overarching mission for her business is not to supply a one-size-fits-all script for sexual wellness, but rather to “equip individuals to make informed decisions about themselves, their bodies, and the bodies of those they interact with that align with their own personal value systems and ethics and that add joy and pleasure to the world.”
To achieve this mission, Rogers utilizes a biopsychosocial approach, thus addressing biological, psychological, and social factors when developing customized treatment plans. As such, she often works with a variety of other specialists to ensure a holistic experience for her clients.
“I am honored to work hand-in-hand with therapists, gynecologists, midwives, pelvic floor physical therapists, etc. to fill in their patients’ sexual knowledge gaps,” she explained. “We call this a ‘triadic approach.’ They refer their patients to me, and we are able to work on things like: sexual communication, sexual shame, and the breadth of consent—while they are simultaneously seeing their provider. It becomes a big, beautiful circle of support around the client as we all work together to help them achieve their goals.”
Rogers’ use of somatic exercises—exercises that focus on the body more than the mind—also makes her work stand apart.
“I went back to school again in 2024 for an Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coaching certificate because I wanted to have more somatic tools in my arsenal,” Rogers noted. “What I found was that talking only does so much. Trauma is stored in our bodies, and we need tools, modalities, and exercises to move these old sexual stories through and out of our bodies. I do a lot of attachment work and play-based exercises with my clients. This work requires homework! There are whiteboards, exercises, games, journal prompts, and TED Talks. It’s very interactional.”
Rogers also hosts a podcast called “The Partnership Podcast” with her husband, Trey.
The cornerstone of Rogers’ work—in its many forms—is a compassionate client-centered approach in which clients determine their own goals and pacing. Each client completes an “ASK” (Attitude, Skills, and Knowledge) needs assessment upon intake and can decide how long they want to remain in care; it is a testament to Rogers’ abilities and affability that many of her clients continue to book check-in sessions with her after “graduating” from care.
The beautiful paradox of Rogers’ revolutionization of the sexual education and coaching field is that her approach does not entail the invention and introduction of unknown concepts and practices, but rather calls for a return to oneself. As one of her clients told her: “This doesn’t feel like learning; it feels like remembering.”
In the face of the trauma she endured and the ever-present stigma associated with the subject of her work, Rogers remains hopeful that she and other compassionate and informed leaders in her field will enact widespread positive change.
“The World Health Organization says that sexual health is fundamental to the wellbeing of individuals, families, and communities, and I believe that with my entire heart,” she noted. “When I see a couple do the healing work inside of sessions with me, it directly benefits their children and their friend groups because they can then pass on information about things like consent and healthy communication. What we start to see is this phenomenon called social contagion, which can help heal communities.”
